I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
