Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize