So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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