sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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