I'm gonna have a badass scar
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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