I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
