she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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