Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
