I want to have your abortion
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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