If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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