Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed http://tfl.nu/q5pw
  Replies (7) Good night (1700) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again http://tfl.nu/89sh
  Replies (29) Good night (1125) Bad night (2942)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food. http://tfl.nu/a6vh
  Replies (14) Good night (3506) Bad night (813)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it http://tfl.nu/sa3y
  Replies (52) Good night (1449) Bad night (6266)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat. http://tfl.nu/zq2c
  Replies (22) Good night (1462) Bad night (3622)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast... http://tfl.nu/eo63
  Replies (9) Good night (5228) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity. http://tfl.nu/17zq
  Replies (8) Good night (2554) Bad night (992)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad. http://tfl.nu/fabc
  Replies (7) Good night (1541) Bad night (2379)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.

  (602): View more from Arizona

  What other scale is there?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale. (602): What other scale is there? http://tfl.nu/fdnh
  Replies (17) Good night (2636) Bad night (677)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker. http://tfl.nu/umuy
  Replies (13) Good night (1383) Bad night (525)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it. http://tfl.nu/7121
  Replies (9) Good night (578) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS http://tfl.nu/o0md
  Replies (2) Good night (1105) Bad night (500)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind. http://tfl.nu/12c7
  Replies (3) Good night (798) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset http://tfl.nu/8p8i
  Replies (7) Good night (1056) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?! http://tfl.nu/arig
  Replies (3) Good night (1420) Bad night (336)

Randomize