Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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