We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize