i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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