My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Randomize
