Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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