Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
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