Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
