his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize