I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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