Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
