I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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