I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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