If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
porn star boner night. come get it.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
