He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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