: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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