I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
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