school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
My vagina is officially offended.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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