he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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