i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
