No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
