We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize