Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
