Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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