I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
