you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
