I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
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