Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
