"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize