How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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