all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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