I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
