Christians are straight up FREAKS
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Im part way to drunk.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
