So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
