Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Randomize
