I just made out with a guy for $7.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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