it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
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