why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize