omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Two words: blizzard sex
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
