Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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